If you love your partner and want to spend the rest of your life with them, you perhaps expect him to commit to you, ask for your hand in marriage, and walk down the aisle with you. You picture a lovely wedding in the presence of your loved ones, then exchanging vows and beginning a new chapter of your life together. Many women have had the same dream.
However, there are too many cases of relationships breaking up before a goal is achieved. Instead, challenges might come along, leading to breakups thereafter. Consequently, one has to readjust oneself since all the dreams have been shuttered, and everything moves on. This is quite disheartening!
Making your relationship last long involves more than just love.
Men are simple
For this to work, you should be able to comprehend him. Without comprehension, things won’t work out, and the relationship will eventually collapse.
So many women hardly know these things about their men, even though it is pretty common among men to go with ladies too much and play hide-and-seek games when they sense that you are interested in them or there is some chemistry between the two of you. If you know these things and act accordingly, then there is a possibility that you will be happy in your relationship, quite peaceful on the inside, and even get yourself old grandchildren as well.
1. How men solve problems
You sit at home with your man while watching Stranger Things and sharing popcorn.
Suddenly, an urgent call is made to him, which requires his immediate attention.
In such cases, what should you do? Do you immediately start offering solutions like most females would, but should that be the appropriate way?
The correct option is no.
Men usually have to first think within themselves when faced with a challenge because they want to be able to come up with potential solutions after having thought about it silently without any external interference. Later, they ask other people for their feedback so as to fine-tune their ideas.
Giving him suggestions before taking them into the matter is not helping.
Instead, keep calm and give him time to think about it himself. You should, however, desist from offering your opinions until he requests them.
This way of doing things is acceptable.
Remember: Men talk less while working on ways to solve their issues. Do not give any suggestions until he requests them.
2. What men see as love
She complained that he was never there for her. He doesn’t have quality time, is always on the run, and doesn’t seem to want her near him; he prefers other women.
I knew him so well that I knew what he loved to do.
He was an earnest businessperson, too.
“I would suggest you be there for him and find a way to help instead of just sleeping with him always,” I advised her.
She refused.
He dumped her after some time.
“My best friend Josh never helps me with anything. She only complains that I do not spend time with her, preferring to have the lady assist me at my store. I can never take such nonsense anymore.”
As we talk, he is deeply in love with this lady who has been helping him.
The meaning of love to men is service.
Finances, emotional support, and spiritual matters mostly are some of the main areas in which he would require assistance from her.
He will love you when you are helpful and respect you too much to lose you at any price.
Just believe me.
3. Men’s relationship with solitude
I have found, said Matthew Bates, that there are more comfortable men with loneliness than women. Some of us even prefer it.
“Solitude” in the actual sense and in a non-literal sense as “being alone” and “being single,” respectively.
Young women especially worry too much about being single, even if it only takes a few weeks or days. For instance, some girls in my high school used to date their boyfriends before finding another. I never saw boys behaving like this; upon disliking the lady, they simply broke up rather than waiting for another one. While they might complain about not having sex, they would never talk about the lack of a relationship
This culture persisted on in campus as well where if any girl remained unmarried past a certain age. This tended to confirm what most women go through ─ an incomplete existence. For instance, when boys’ girlfriends dumped them off it seemed like a carte blanche for some men instead of being a disaster..
It took years for my wife to realize how much I enjoyed solitude after we married and started living together. Before marrying her, I lived alone for many years. But those years were not full of sorrow. Sometimes, when I look bad there, most days are good because I go back there happily. However, all that changed after getting married and having kids.
Nevertheless, occasionally, my wife will find me sitting in silence in one of the rooms in our house, neither watching TV nor reading anything, listening to music, or checking my mail, just taking in the peaceful surroundings. She knows better now, so she left me to be.
I sometimes think this is related to ancient days of stalking and hunting. When you spend long periods alone, there’s something about it that just makes you feel right”.
Matthew Osterloh’s own experience made it even more apparent;
“You have no idea how right you are. There were days when I’d work from home just to have some proper alone time.!
Even though my wife is lovely, she didn’t know how important being alone was to me. She wanted us to be together all the time.
She’s not clingy, but her expectation is exactly what you have said. She EXPECTS us to spend as much time together as possible, which is great.
However, there must be a period when I mind my own business and my wife does whatever pleases. When married, it is important to be an individual individually, even in marriage.”
4. Sometimes, his mind travels
Rebecca Hallie shared her husband’s dinner-time experience:
“Both of us were taking supper together, and Thomas remained silent. This made me regret everything: have I made any mistakes? Did I make him angry by certain remarks, or what was it? He just gazed into space, his eyes half closed and clouded by easily discernible uneasiness.
He had not spoken for some time. I pushed my food around on my plate inelegantly while musing on the events of that day, trying to understand where things went wrong between us.
What could be going on in his mind? Why’s he acting that coldly? When it comes to situations like this, I usually stop eating.
His gaze snapped back to me.
“What’s wrong?” I inquired.
Mm? Oh, I’m just trying to figure out how to cut the flooring so it fits within these door frame grooves in an ideal way”. He looked up.
When he doesn’t talk and acts like he is in a serious music video, think about it nine out of ten times; it is not about what you did or some other person in his mind.
Most likely, it’s the kind of things he deals with, like cutting floors.
Final word
Know these things about men, walk in this new light, and you’ll have a deeper and longer-lasting relationship with your man.
Cheers!